"Man fakes heart attack in court"

The defendant (who was representing himself) was examining a witness when he suddenly dropped to the ground, apparently having a heart attack. The judge did not buy it. You wouldn't be too when the defendant became wide awake after inhaling smelling salts.

I smell a contempt around the corner...

Enduring High Oil Prices

A funny thing happened on my way home yesterday. I was riding a jeepney when it suddenly stalled in the middle of the road. The culprit? The jeep ran out of fuel. And irony of ironies, the jeep stalled just across a gas station. When later asked by an irate passenger on why he didn't have the tank filled much earlier, the driver just said, "ang mahal na kasi ng diesel e. Nasasayangan akong magpakarga ng malaki." The jeepney driver didn't want to spend too much on diesel, despite the fact that he will have to buy more sooner or later. I think he bought fuel tingi style just to get that perception of saving a few bucks.

But that, my friends, is the big story in the world - rising oil prices. As of now, there seems to be nothing anyone could do to reverse the trend. So we'll just have to endure rising oil prices in the coming weeks (or months! or years!). Inevitably, prices of other commodities will follow the upward trend (Read this post of a Malaysian blogger to know the implications of higher oil prices for Asia). It seems that everything will go up, except for my allowance (and my grades, but that is another matter). All I can do is sigh.

Photo: azrainman, Creative Commons, Flickr

Random Thought: Iterate and Reiterate

Did you know that iterate and reiterate have the same meaning? They mean: to say or do again or again and again.

Ergo, saying that you "reiterate once more" is superfluous. So is "repeat again." Lawyers and even the Court are prone to such redundancy. Don't believe me? Click the link and search for the term highlighted for examples.

Needless to say, stating that you "iterate, reiterate and repeat again once more for the second time around" is stressing your point a tad too much.


Photo: sutefani in orlando, Creative Commons, Flickr

Ways to be Disbarred

Lawyers, in their infinite wisdom, find ingenious ways to get themselves booted off the profession. Listed below are just some of the examples. Mind you, this is not an exhaustive list. There is more than one way to skin a cat, as they say. But you'll get the idea of what not to do if you're a lawyer in the following instances:

Keeping a mistress, entering into another marriage while a prior one still subsists, as well as abandoning and/or mistreating your wife and children (Tapucar v. Tapucar);

Receiving from an adverse party money pursuant to an amicable settlement, but never giving the proceeds to your client. (Resureccion v. Sayson);

Taking advantage of the law profession in committing the crime of falsification of public document to defraud your clients. (In Re Avanceña);

Having an illicit relationship with a married woman and her niece at the same time. (Royong v. Oblena);

Misrepresenting yourself to be a bachelor, then marrying your very powerful and influential client's daughter. (Cojuangco v. Palma);

Entering into multiple marriages and then resorting to legal remedies to sever them (Macarrubo v. Macarrubo);

Borrowing from the clerk of court the folder containing the adverse party's evidence, surreptitiously tearing off two pages, crumpling the papers and placing them inside your pocket. (Fernandez v. Grecia);

Raping your neighbor's wife (Calub v. Suller);

Through attrocious maneuvers, successfully delaying the disposition of an estate settlement for thirty-eight (38) years (Re: Administrative Case no. 44 of RTC, Branch IV, Tagbilaran);

Continuing to practice despite being disbarred [Technically, you're not going to be disbarred anymore, because you were already disbarred, but you are subject to contempt] (San Luis v. Pineda);

Extorting money from his client through deceit and misrepresentation (Docena v. Limon);

Swindling your client (Villanueva v. Sta. Ana).


Photo: kevindooley, Creative Commons, Flickr

Suing Sulpicio

There is no need to hire the services of a lawyer because the claims will be acted upon with dispatch and with as simple documentation as possible.
- Sulpicio Lines Announcement

I am normally in favor of compromises. I think it's best to avoid lawsuits because they're messy, and the contending parties usually end up being poorer after the long fight.

But this time, I'm making a big exception. To the kins of the MV Princess of the Stars tragedy: sue Sulpicio's ass!

A criminal conviction is highly unlikely. Officers of corporations in the Philippines seldom get convicted of criminal wrongdoing. A criminal conviction of the officers of a high-profile corporation is even rarer.

But a civil action for damages against the corporation can cripple them financially. A ruling in favor of the victims will not be hard to obtain, in my opinion. As a common carrier, Sulpicio is bound to exercise extraordinary diligence, which it obviously failed to do. There is already a presumption that it is at fault or has acted negligently, since scores of death and injury to passengers stare us right in the face.

Claiming the P200,000 and signing the quitclaim will end the fight against the (ir)responsible company. Sue the owners and ask for exorbitant damages. Hurt them where it will hurt them most - in their pockets.

A Tragicomedy that is Sulpicio

Wanna have a laugh? Go to Sulipcio Lines' website. A tongue-in-cheek statement at its best:

Equipped with the experience, knowledge and dominant presence in marine transportation and the continuing determination to excel, Sulpicio Lines in the 21 st century aims to further strengthen its position as the most reliable provider of quality service and customer satisfaction.

Take a break: Father and Son

A fresh young lawyer took over the cases of his aging father, who was likewise a lawyer.

One of them is an inheritance case which has dragged on for fifteen years.

The young lawyer wanted to impress his father, so he finished the case in just under a year.

He relayed the news to his father. But instead of the expected tap on the back from his dad, he got a slap to the nape.

"Why did you do that for?" asked the perplexed youngster.

Still seething, the old lawyer answered, "You fool! I kept that case alive for you so that you can milk it like I did! And now it's gone! Didn't you know that that case put you through college and lawschool?!?"